The Scrooge Diaries

So you think you know the Christmas Carol story? Bah!

‘Marley was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that.’

“Oh no he wasn’t! Bah! Dead? Humbug, Mr Dickens! Dead? As sure as the clothes moths in my wardrobe have be-shredded my best nightcap, Marley was not dead but rather sitting on some sun-soaked, off-shore beach squandering all the hard-earned money that he had so fraudulently embezzled from my firm over the years! Dead? Bah!

You know nothing Mr.Dickens! YOU are a fraud sir – an embezzler of the truth! A fake news-smith! A charlatan… Charlatan Dickens! Bah!”

In this revelatory exclusive, Ebeneezer Scrooge opens his Diary to expose the awful truth about Tiny Tim, the Fezziwigs, Jacob Marley and that disgustingly jolly, gluttonous, consumer-driven Ghost of Christmas Present as he reveals the truth behind A Christmas Carol and the vengeful, slanderous, upstart author of that novel.

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